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Hello, mortals.

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rocker310:

stylishirish:

horain:

stylishirish:

this guy i know throws this wild crazy party at the end of every school year and he invites literally everyone in our grade and this year i’m gonna call the cops ahead of time to shut it down because i once let him borrow a pencil and he never gave it back 

that’s a lot of anger over just 1 pencil.

it was a mechanical pencil 

You may proceed

(via dinofarts)

firelorcl:

i scare people lots because i walk very softly and they don’t hear me enter rooms so when they turn around i’m just kind of there and their fear fuels me

(via dinofarts)

fuckyeahtattoos:

A DNA strand breaking into a universe - I love my clients!!

designed and tattooed by ME

Leah Williams, Denver, CO

Instagram: @wench_tattoos

kanyewestevil:

WE ONLY USE LEASHES BECAUSE DOGS CANT HOLD HANDS

(Source: kanyewesticle, via dinofarts)

(Source: nogitsunecalum, via dinofarts)

spermbanker:

seattle man. a local hero.

(via dinofarts)

corenevipera:

fovelshucker:

TODAY MY CHEMISTRY TEACHER BURNED A DOLLAR IN FRONT OF US BUT HE FORGOT TO TELL US THAT THE DOLLAR WOULDNT BURN ONLY THE ALCOHOL WOULD SO HE TOOK OUT A 100 DOLLAR BILL AND SOAKED IT IN ALCOHOL AND WERE LIKE “WHAT ARE YOU DOING” AND HE CAUGHT IT ON FIRE AND WE ALL YELLED AT HIM BUT THEN IT WENT OUT AND THE BILL WAS FINE AND WE WERE SILENT FOR 20 MINUTES


How to get your class to shut up for the entire period: science teacher edition

(Source: actuallybadcop, via engrprof)

geardrops:

lucyliuism:

g0thamsreckoning:

oh my gOD 

i hAVE BEEN LAUGHING AT THIS FOR 29834798234 YEARS

flawless

(Source: timkarinn, via nosimplewaytoeatspaghetti)